Could have been Matt Damon 16 3, 2:58am

Okay, Sweden, just lie doooown on this couch here and relax.
Take a deep breath.
There you go. Good boy.
Now, tell Dr DarkMage all your worries.

"Well, Dr, this one time Åland and I walked in on my sister whipping Finland's nuts with a notted shoelace, and--"

On second thought, why don't you have a beer first?