Take the wheel

As promised, an explanation for why people in France drive so hazardly.

Toxoplasma gondii has a life cycles dependent on cats and rats and its effect on the brain is meant to make it easier for cats to catch rats, but sometimes cat excrements end up in farm animals' food, infecting them and passing it on to us. You only risk infection from meat if you don't cook it properly so it's mostly a problem in countries where heating meat can be a problem. France is the only European country where so many people are infected because French cuisine involves so much raw or mildly cooked meat.

This is of course not the only reason why French people are such aggressive drivers, but it does seem to be strongly linked to toxoplasma gondii.

(Also, if people don't want to get help after an accident, get help anyway because they might have brain damage)

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Buckle up!

Years ago I talked with some Swedish people who told me about a French friend of theirs who was super proud that her car only had one dent, which came of as pretty bizarre to the Swedes.

I've been to France two times, and if you've been there too, you know how much sense that actually makes. Almost every single car we passed had several dents and scratches, and if you think people in your area are aggressive drivers you have not been to France.

And the reason why people drive like that in France is way more bizarre than you think, but I'll make a comic about that soon.

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Society will crumble

All those tiny social rules are so easy to mess up, yet can mean life or death.

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Postcard

This is the postcard seen in the Wish you were here comic.

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France Super Long

Thank you for supporting us!

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Eurovision 2013

Belarus http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XKewBfUE2Mg and France http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hQwiQj5Dyj8 wore similar dresses. One more sparkley than the other.

Netherlands http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n5iazXvMw5o Can't be seen in the video, but it started with a clip of the singer boxing the air on top of a house, followed by her singing of birds falling from rooftops...

Malta http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3EiuqczFZhQ The only way they could have made it cuter would be to have puppies perform the number.

Moldovia http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xckgLUv73Jc was supposed to be a volcano, but I have to admit it reminded me more of an upside down ice cream cone because of her hair.

Italy http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S8oaxDV1q6o looked ever so adorably confused and like he was asking "I don't have any money. I hope this is good enough" which paled awfully next to Romania's http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VgHWFiavqjA glittery vampire that would send Edward Cullen running for his money.

Azerbaijan http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iN3d_V7KVLE had a man in a box, and was very close to winning.

And finally the Nordics.
Finland http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dlBXOveVh7c had a lesbian kiss at the end of a song to her boyfriend.
Iceland http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GzE88IYzXLI had Marvel/Hollywood Thor.
Norway http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kjb_9ngE1sE had a super tight dress.
Sweden http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vtjdTPnCcu0 had a guy sweeping his dancers off their feet.
And Denmark http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p3f9v8ebuD4 won Eurovision with an *ahem* golden shower.

There was LOTS more going on, such as a giant http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BMxpv8naRd8 and hipsters http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rOimfHq76xk but dammit, I only have so much paper.

I do think it's rather sweet though that the winning song "Only Teardrops" is actually about Europe and a plea for everyone to get along.

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Battle Cry

The "sue culture" of the US will never not be funny to the rest of us. ;)

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Golden Dawn

Paris was very beautiful, but the smell of urine just saturated the place. When I talked about it on the internet a few people responded with, "Even the airport smells like pee :C"
I have no idea what the Frenchmen are up to at night, but it must be fun. XD

Technically the flag on Brother France should be mirrored because we see him from the back, but no doubt people wouldn't notice and keep asking me why it was the wrong way.

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French Siblings

I'm sorry for spamming you with random crap, but I can't sleep.
Here you have the French siblings, and just to clear one thing up: A lot of people seem to think that the male sibling is automatically the "main country" so I've seen quite a few people asking "why do we only see Sister France and not France?"
In the case of France, she is the main character, and her brother comes second, so it's France and Brother France.

Brother France has pretty much the same personality as his sister, though he can be more rude and likes to play the role of the misunderstood artist. Finding him slashing and/or burning his own paintings while naked is not unusual, unless he's protesting something and going on strike.

I imagine him to have very elegant (borderline feminine) movements, but a rather deep voice.

The quote is from this song http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t-mooING0ak

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Driving

Driving in France with an Englishman was quite interesting. At first I thought I my view of French driving had been colored by my English chauffeur, but later I talked to a French girl who said, "As soon as you learn how to drive in France, you realize that everyone are out to get you"
Me: "But only in Paris, right? They must be more polite out in the countryside"
Her: "No" XD

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