Thanks Ingvar

Yes, a sad day. As nice as the joke with the coffin is, I really don't understand that everlasting fuzz about left over screws and unclear instructions. My impression is that every moron could assemble Ikea stuff... as long as s/he sticks to the instruction and doesn't try shortcuts or things s/he thinks to know better. The items I ever had problems with where cheap Ikea-copies, but never any genuine Ikea-item. And most of the time I was impressed by the craftspeoples' and engineers ingenuity, who designed the item. My big living room table, for example: I could take all parts out of the box in just the right order to assemble them, and when I was ready, there was a table upside-down in the box, just turn it over and - tadah!
I guess the poorly assembled coffin is due to Sweden's lack of concentration while he was mourning.
Rest in peace, Ingvar, and godspeed.

@Eldkatten

"My impression is that every moron could assemble Ikea stuff... as long as s/he sticks to the instruction and doesn't try shortcuts or things s/he thinks to know better."

WORD!

That, in my experience, is the real problem.

People think they're too smart to need the instructions and spend 40 minutes ripping open every bag, mixing all the parts and putting them together in the wrong way.

Then they end up complaining about the stupid instructions that wasn't written in the way they thought the furniture should be assembled, whining about the screws they never understood where they should go since they assembled the piece incorrectly - or the screw that's missing because they've let it roll under the sofa.

Opening the bags in order, counting all pieces before you begin, reading through the instructions completely and then following them step by step no grown up could have a real problem assembling an IKEA piece, really.

@Nisse_Hult I agree with Nisse.
Atlas has shrugged.

@DarkMage7280

Once in a blue moon ey? ;-)

@DarkMage7280
I don't agree as in here reading the instructions is cheating.

@Eldkatten

I agree, for me the joke was always MFI and missing screws, bolts and nuts. Ikea has always been rather good, I'd rather have extra than not enough.

@Eldkatten I read your response and thought "hmm, probably German" and then I looked at the flag on your account and yep, German indeed. I'll try to explain: non-German people do not read instructions, nor do they want to do anything - and I mean ANYTHING - without taking a shortcut. We believe that we always know better than the engineers who designed the items. After all, they are not here right now with us in the room, so how could they possibly know how the thing is supposed to be that we are assembling? This is illogical, and we are aware of it, but we don't try to resolve the paradox because that is hard to do and it is easier to take the shortcut of not resolving the paradox. Thus we don't follow the instructions and always have a screw left over and items that do not work.

I learned this because my stepfather is of German lineage and an engineer, and for a while when he moved in we were all mystified at 1) how long it took him to do things, and 2) that things actually worked properly when he was finished with them.

RIP Ingvar

@spookycrisp "thought "hmm, probably German" and then I looked at the flag on your account"... that's really funny because I added the flag just a minute after I had written the comment, because I noticed that everyone has a flag here, except me :-)

@spookycrisp Am I disqualified to agree with Eldkatten's comment because I am German, too? ;) I really think Ikea buyer can be put in two categories:
-People who pay attention and follow the manual
-People who don't pay attention and ignore the manual

@Eldkatten "My impression is that every moron could assemble Ikea stuff... as long as s/he sticks to the instruction and doesn't try shortcuts or things s/he thinks to know better."

it's the "I know better" you have to watch out for. one time my husband spent hours failing to put together a set of shelves, then stomped off to the pub in disgust. I opened the instructions, realised he had the sides upside down in relation to the back and shelves and 2o minutes later I joined him in the pub, with the shelves assembled

@Eldkatten

I had one office chair I bought that I could not get the screws to all go where they were supposed to (attaching the seat). I think the chair seat was a bit warped or something, and I had to fudge it. It still worked fine but was not as elegantly assembled as I would have liked.

I've had leftover screws plenty of times but that's because they gave me extras. It's handy for if you drop one somewhere you can't get at it.

@Eldkatten I've heard from people who've had access to Ikea far longer than I have (my town just got an IKEA a year ago) that they've come a long, long way since then, but back in the day the reputation was well deserved.

@Eldkatten Exactly! You have one or two tasks at most per picture, with everything lined out and every part numbered. It is basically an easier version of Lego, which is still easy as long as you follow the bloody instructions.

Whenever the gag of Ikea being hard to assemble comes up, I always have to reassess if the characters are meant to be morons.

@Eldkatten listen

don't underestimate how stupid i can be

Even Finland is crying... i can't take this anymore... it's so sad

@SeptiplierLover
Sad Finland... it's a bit like wet water.

Did he die from natural or from a mob of angry people with a desk that somehow turned into a clock.

*Looks Around* Every piece of furniture in the room is from IKEA.

@skogsmard Except for the couch, every single piece of furniture to enter the door has been one of Ingvar's.

@HateToBreakItToYou I can relate

I'd say about half.

@skogsmard only one piece of furniture in my room is from ikea... i am a dissapointment

I'm Finnish and I can totally relate to Finland's sadness. If I could build a whole house, it would be filled with IKEA. I'm like a kid in a candy store when shopping there and no one really wants to go with me because I became so annoying. "OH MY GOSH LOOK AT THIS! I WANT THAT AND THAT AND THAT AND THAT.... THAT'S SOOOOOOO CUTE LOOK!" I know, I'm weird when it comes to IKEA.

I'm not sure how many others feel this way. But yeah, I still think IKEA is very popular here in Finland.

@jensku
I totally understand. This happened to me once, when I visited an IKEA by myself:

Me: Okay... I'll just buy the kettle, and that's it.

*thirty minutes later*

Me: (exiting, with my arms full of stuff) Goddammit.

@DarkMage7280
"Me: (exiting, with my arms full of stuff) Goddammit"

Well. If ever I had a motto, that's about what it would be.

@Chuuken Don't forget going to the restaurants. One can never forget their Swedish meatballs.

@HateToBreakItToYou Swedish meatballs are one of my favorite things in this world. I also love the Elderflower flavored juice boxes!

@jensku

I know one who is almost like you.

I don't want to count all the IKEA items, but one of them keeps me warm at night.

@Morbid "but one of them keeps me warm at night."

I didn't know you could buy girlfriends at IKEA?

@Tarmaque

You give them new ideas.

Who knows how will IKEA evolve after Ingvar?

@Morbid
IKEA stove?
I thought Finland has Tulikivi stoves?

@ThorsomeTarmukas

A blanket.

@jensku
*looks around*
Not a single thing in this house is from ikea, lol.

Humon please remove or atleast reform new Update.

Edit: Downvoters tell me why you disagree with me? This is terrible!

@Mixu Dude, don't EVER expect downvoters to explain them downvoting you. I asked the same in Cracked.com, and received...

*drumroll*

...more downvotes.

@DarkMage7280 I got more Upvotes than Downvotes. And that Update back then was terrible but I understand some people finding it even good.

what you need to understand here... is that Ingvar changed the world we live in.....

everything used to cost half a man..

Ingvar is the reason you have a goddamn bench.

@snow2nose and "nej".

@snow2nose The reason I have a goddamn bench is that I placed a big goddamn piece of slate on top of two smaller goddamn pieces of slate. Ingvar was nowhere to be seen.

I'll never understand peoples struggle to assemble IKEA furniture.

Ingvar was a good man and a great leader. He'll be missed dearly.

@Gret Problem is instruction translations. It might be good in some languages, but for some they use google translator or something. It is impossible to read, or you are afraid to read it because it is possible incantation for summoning eldritch horrors. Oh also if it says you need 2 people, most likely you will need 3...

@MiskisM How would you even have problems with translating IKEA instructions? They don't even include any words...

@VeryCreativeName Hmm.. That might be the problem. In some countries they have words. Words are confusing.

I, too, was freshly escaped from prison (a scary divorce), was close to broke in a new city, and needed furniture for my tiny apartment. Thanks, Mr. Kamprad. My first few days of freedom were spent putting a dresser and an armoir together. I followed the directions, and the sense of accomplishment was a great way to start a new life.

RIP

Let's all hope he has better luck making it to heaven than we do finding the exit to IKEA.

@GrayOwl OMG you heard of that SCP too?! Or is it a joke on how large and confusing IKEA stores are?

@Bluesamurai I do know that SCP, but I was making a joke about how you ALWAYS get lost in IKEA.

@GrayOwl Oh, thats cool! i get it XD

@GrayOwl
You need to learn where the shortcuts are. Every IKEA has shortcuts which will allow you to skip nearly the entire labyrinth. They are often pretty well hidden, but they are there.

@Narf It better not be some Mines of Moria kind of shortcut. I don't exactly know the Swedish word for "Friend".

@GrayOwl Friend = Vän Friends = Vänner

You now have the required knowledge to open the gates, but beware, there are rumors of an IKEA Balrog and home assembled goblins residing there, be careful.

@ScanianDreng Can't be any worse than what I encounter on the daily here in America.

Granted, the biggest dangers can only move by motorized shopping cart, so I'm not sure how that compares.

@GrayOwl Motorized shopping carts?

@ScanianDreng Yeah. You know, shopping carts you can ride and drive around?

They're supposed to be used by the physically disabled, but they're used a lot more by people who really have no business using them.

@GrayOwl I know what they are but are they that common?

@ScanianDreng Pretty much.

And the way they act, I'd much rather fight off a few furniture goblins.

@GrayOwl Although Ikea Balrogs and Goblins aren't listed here this might still be useful: https://www.boredpanda.com/ikea-monster-instructions-ed-harrington/

@ScanianDreng What's the little tube/pipe looking thing on all of them supposed to be?

@GrayOwl The one that looks like an S without curves? A tool used to screw certain screws and quasi-screw things that are common in IKEA furniture.

@ScanianDreng Strange...

How exactly do I use it to build a human centi-
You know what, I'd rather not ask.

@ScanianDreng
Estonian language has a cognate to Vän. It is vennas, meaning either a brother or a friend or a young friendly man.
Vennaste+kogudus = brotherhood (in faith)

@ThorsomeTarmukas Interesting, do you know more about it's etymology?

@ScanianDreng
"Interesting, do you know more about it's etymology?"
Not much.
There is another similar word: vennike (a smallish friend that usually has to resort to the help of a bigger friend).