Eurovision 2012

So this year's winner is Sweden. He is quite pleased. Just look at his happy little face. ^u^

He fought quite a battle with the Russian grannies, but ended up beating them.

The "screw you" to Norway and Denmark is because Sweden only gave 3 points to Norway and nothing to Denmark.
In the end Norway ended up at the very bottom with only 7 points and Denmark fourth last with 21 points.

The rest can be explained by the acts.
Sweden and the tai chi dance http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pfo-8z86x80
Russia and the grannies http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BgUstrmJzyc A translation of the song http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=50lwhKLjxT0
France and her hunks http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0DZ7DbdeOeE The official video is much the same, plus gas mask action http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SnSmB7uBo-Y
Turkey and his man-boat http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Qa7_y21oOY
Greece http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NreIi8ma_PY
Iceland http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zRqmHRbJvTo
Norway http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-ZaxIY1VAbM
Denmark http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U5X2r_t-KBk

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Leaking

I finally got around to making a comic about the whole Wiki Leaks and Julian Assange mess.

For those of you wondering why Australia got the role as Assange, it’s simply because Assange is Australian.

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The Boogeyman Comes at Night

I rather like the idea of Russia going around to the countries that used to be part of him and try to convince them to come back when he’s drunk, scaring the shit out of them.

This is dedicated to Provass http://provass.deviantart.com/ who draws so many weird and wonderful pictures of my characters.

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Drunken Party

Atlantis and all his magic friends have confused many drunks throughout history.

Drunks from left to right: Scotland, Ireland, Finland, Australia, Belgium, Russia, Netherlands, Germany, Denmark and Greece in the last picture.

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The mind of a child

England got his proper flag this time, mainly because I’m a lazy fuck who hates drawing the UK flag over and over.

Anyway, the story behind this is that it took forever for Denmark and England to become friends while Sweden and especially Norway befriended him fairly quickly. Denmark on the other hand got friendly with Russia whom most of the world didn't like.

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Pussy Whipped

Oh America. You have no idea what kind of women Finland has to deal with.

I debated with myself for a long time about who should be teasing Finland. The original idea was Denmark, but I also considered Russia and even Italy. I ended up with USA for two reasons:
The next comic will have him interacting with Sister Iceland/Norway/Denmark and that way he will have been in contact with all the Nordic sisters. But also because he is pretty much just a big teenager and still a virgin, so even one of these women would have been too much for him.

Yes, “Whopa” is a failed whipping sound.

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Questionable Invasion

Years ago I watched a Danish program where a clairvoyant mentioned that Denmark had a lot of “Star People” but didn’t specify what that was. I thought she meant “star gazers” (babies that a born facing upwards).

Then a couple of months ago I watched an American program where an English clairvoyant was visiting sights around America. At one point he got out of the car in a small town and said, “Interesting. This town has 8 or 9 Star People. That’s unusual”
“What are Star People?” the host asked.
“A higher race of beings who are visiting us from far away stars, and are born as humans. They’re quite rare in America so it’s really impressive that a small town like this has that many”
“Don’t they like our president?” the host joked.
“Maybe” he smiled “They’re born all over the world, but for some reason most of them choose Scandinavia”
“What are they doing there?”
“Nobody knows, but it’s quite overwhelming how many go there. In fact, last time I visited Denmark two years ago, 1 out of 5 people were Star People, and the number seems to be increasing. I’ve been told it’s the same in Sweden and Norway, and a lot of Star People who were born in other places are drawn to the countries. We are many who are just waiting to see what happens”

Then they started talking about something else, but the mental picture of Scandinavians as aliens is quite funny.

So be afraid, great nations of the world! For we have come to conquer the Earth, and will not rest before every man, woman and child eats pickled herring, visits Legoland every year and rests in Ikea furniture! MUWAHAHAHAHA!!! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JDZBgHBHQT8

...By god. We’re the lamest aliens ever.

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Don't mess with Aland

I promised myself that I wouldn’t post another Åland comic so soon after the last one, but after reading about The Kumlinge Battle I had to.

During the Finnish war Russia chased the Swedish soldiers off of Åland. Then they went home, but left about 450 well trained soldiers behind in case the Swedes would come back. The soldiers started getting bossy and tried commanding the Ålanders around and make them harvest their grain for them. The Ålanders were not happy about that at all, so a few sneaked back to Sweden and said, “They want us to work for them, but we will stay faithful to the Swedish king. We are ready to do anything, but we need help!”
The Swedes wanted to help, but could only effort to send a few soldiers and guns for the farmers. With their new weapons the Ålanders, all farmers who had no military training whatsoever, sneaked up on the Russian soldiers and surprised them. In fact the Ålanders were so vicious and good that the Russians thought they were up against an army of Swedish soldiers and decided to surrender.
Across from the battlefield the Ålanders looked confused on as Russians started waving white flags. Because they had no military training they didn’t understand the signal, and just kept shooting! The Russiand must have thought they were crazy.
It didn’t stop before some Swedish soldiers saw what was going on and told them to stop. Great was the Russians’ humiliation when they realised they had surrenders to farmers!
Only three people dired during the battle.

Sweden was so very proud of Åland that day.

As http://gefreitervonadler.deviantart.com/ put it: “So don't mess with Åland. The only reason he has agreed to all the non-fortification and non-militarisation treaties since the Crimean war and the destruction of Bomarsund is that he is so badass that he does not need them.” ;)

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Funny Movie

If someone ever asks you if you would like to see a Swedish, Norwegian, Danish, Icelandic, Finnish or Russian comedy then...well, I won’t say “Run for your life!!” but I will say “Be careful”.

Movies in the north loves to deal with serious issues like death, drugs, alcohol and other fun stuff, and even most of our comedies will leave you with a feeling that the world is a horrible place.

You think I’m exaggerating? Fine, but don’t say I didn’t warn you when you sit in the dark, crying.

A nice example is this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XE4ZBcK01HU It’s considered one of the funniest scenes in the movie. He doesn’t like that the cow is looking at him.
And punching woman is funny too http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E2WrE7SKmK4

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Climate Conference in Copenhag

There has been a lot of talk about all the oil that might be near the North Pole, and now that the ice is melting it will get easier to find. USA, Russia and Denmark are the three countries fighting the hardest to claim the North Pole before that happens.

And if Denmark can’t get the oil under the North Pole, we will make the rest of the world help us in keeping anyone else from getting it!

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