Border Control

Made this comic last year for Comic Party http://comicparty.dk/ which is why you get two comics about German/Danish relations in a row.

Anyway, when Denmark briefly got a bit of it's border control back last year (stopped 1 in 100 cars or something like that) the Germans didn't just complain that it was against European agreements, but also took it as a very personal attack on them, probably because Germany is the only country connected to Denmark by land.

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Better late than never

A lot of Europeans have asked if I would do a comic about how some Americans act like they personally ended WWII, and the irony of "Do you speak German? No? You're welcome!" of course being that a lot of countries outside of Germany are taught German in school. Not because of WWII, but because Germany is a big and important country so it helps to understand the language. Even I who can only speak very little German understand quite a bit of it, and I don't even know why.

Next after Sweden and Norway, Germany is Denmark's best friend, especially in the tourist season. They have always had a bit of a "I hate to love you" relationship ranging from Denmark still imitating Germany when they were at war, to Germany still wanting to go to Denmark even after it felt betrayed when Denmark briefly got it's border control back.

Even during WWII Nazi Germany treated Denmark nicely (Well, as nicely as Nazi Germany could treat anyone) and made it possible for Denmark to ship 99% of it's Jews to Sweden before Denmark got invaded and then made an agreement with Nazi Germany that the remaining Danish Jews weren't allowed to get killed and not be sent to the really bad concentration camps. Danish Jews became quite popular in the camps they went to because the guards would usually steal the food that was sent to people in the camps, but only stole cigarettes and candy from the Danish Jews thanks to the agreement, so they had something to share with people.

And that is the long answer as to why Denmark don't want America to beat Germany up. The short answer being "because he wants Germany to visit his beaches"

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Precautions

Every summer when tourists start wandering about in other countries there will be stories about them getting attacked by cows. And for some reason most of these stories come from Switzerland.

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Under The Sea

I've seen so many fan-comics talking about Denmark not liking the sea, but that is actually the only part of nature he not only likes, but LOVES.

Denmark is mainly made up of islands so the sea is everywhere, and a lot of Danes feel almost claustrophobic if they get too far away from it.

Denmark is hugging a jellyfish because whenever I talk with Swedes or Norwegians who have been here in the summer, they almost always talk about how insanely many jellyfish we have here.
And the mermaid (merman?) thing is of course a joke on The Little Mermaid. If you want to get something with a mermaid on it, go to a Danish souvenir shop. Mermaids EVERYWHERE!

EDIT: No, I'm not saying Norwegians don't like the sea. Norway is just confused that Denmark does.

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The Easy Way

Religion is a very private thing in the Nordic countries and not something you're supposed to tell others about, both because most people aren't religious so it would be considered rude, and also because they're such personal feelings for religious people.

So a sure way to ruin the mood is to wear a T-shirt with a religious message, or any other object that somehow show what religion you belong to, most of all because Nordics will probably be too polite to talk about it (like I said, you're not supposed to talk about religion), so it will be a huge elephant in the room and they will just sit and stare awkwardly at you, afraid they might say something that'll hurt your religious feelings.

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For Realz!

Music in the background of the last picture http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-sFFYfvgF-w

Anyway, the first picture refers to these videos http://www.youtube.com/user/SwedishMealTime?feature=chclk

The snowman is a reference to a man in Sweden who got trapped in his car without food during a snowstorm and was found two months later, weak but still alive. How did he survive? By eating "a bit of snow".

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Swedish Army

There's a story going around that small breasted women who join the Swedish army are offered the choice of free breast implants. They're also advised to gain a little weights, all intended to make them look bigger, more butch, and matronly. In other words, big breasts are scary. :fear:

You can get a Sister Sweden poster now here http://satwcomic.com/shop/bend-over-poster The poster has been selling a lot better than I thought it would. You naughty people. ;)

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Monster

When I went to England I noticed that people would apologize or even freak out if they as much as touched my little finger. At first I thought that maybe I was putting people off, but later it was explained to me that English people are just incredibly nervous about touching people they don't know very well.

I've been to conventions in quite a few countries by now, and England is the only country where most people asked for a handshake rather than a hug.

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No Flag for You

The Danish flag is the oldest one in the world still in use, and pretty much nothing is known about how it came to be. According to the myth the Danes were fighting the Estonians in Estonia and were about to lose, so the Danes called upon God and asked him for help. Then a flag fell from the sky and a heavenly voice said that the Danes would win under this flag.

Thanks to that story is has become a popular joke in Denmark that God was trying to give the flag to the Estonians (it fell into their country after all) and the Danes just snatched it.

But it would seem that something did indeed happen in that war, because the Latvians have a very similar flag from the same period, so flag-interested people suspect that there might be some kind of link.

Non the less, Estonia was once again left out.

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Still a long way

Not a month goes by without someone confusing Sweden/Switzerland or Denmark/Netherlands. With Sweden/Switzerland it's because of the names of the countries, but with Denmark/Netherlands it's because people from Denmark are called Danish and people from Netherlands are called Dutch.

It's usually Americans who make those mistakes, but the first time I encountered it in real life was actually in England when I got in the wrong line to get into the country. I was supposed to stand in the Europe line but ended up in the Rest of The World line, and one of the women there could apparently tell something was wrong and asked me, "Are you Dutch?" I said no and handed her my passport which said Denmark and she responded with, "That's what I said: Dutch. Why are you lying about where you're from?"

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